Subject: AKLUG List Etiquette
From: W.D.McKinney (deem@wdm.com)
Date: Sat Dec 28 2002 - 23:30:16 AKST
I quote an anonymous Mailing List Etiquette FAQ:
Should I mail a copy to the person I'm replying to?
"That depends, but usually the answer is no. Unlike news,
where followups may take days to reach the original author,
and may sometimes never make it at all, mail service is typically faster and more reliable.
Also unlike news, private copies of postings to mailing lists will result in multiple copies
arriving in the recipient's mailbox, rather than just one. Unless you have good reason to believe that the person needs your
answer as soon as possible, then they'll probably thank you if you stick with just sending it to the list."
I've been insulted! How should I respond?
Ah, congratulations. You've never been properly welcomed to the net until you've been flamed.
Your response can take a number of forms. The first and most important thing you should do is to take a break and cool off.
Replies written in the heat of anger are seldom any better than the postings which inspire them. Revenge is a dish best served cold, as they say.
Now that you've cooled off, go back and consider the offending material again. If it's nothing but baseless lies and
fabrications that no rational person would believe, then the best response is to completely ignore it. If it contains
material that you would consider to be of a slanderous or threatening nature, then you may wish to forward a copy to
the user's postmaster and request that they have a word with the individual about the proper use of the net.
If, on the other hand, the posting contains inaccuracies which you feel need to be addressed, then it is perfectly
reasonable to send a followup message which does so. However, the ideal approach is to ignore any hysteria, and stick
with the facts. Be reasonable and rational, point out your attacker's errors, and their attack will usually collapse
around them. In particular, avoid any personal attacks on an individual's intelligence, age, character, etc.
At the very least, if you cultivate a reputation of being level-headed, then most people will gladly give you
the benefit of the doubt over a knee-jerk flamer.
The final option is to flame them in return, but be very careful when deciding on this course of action.
Well crafted flames are a thing of beauty, but are extremely difficult to write. The ultimate goal of a flame should be
that the recipient know deep in his or her heart that s/he has been terribly insulted, but s/he should not consciously
be able to figure out why s/he feels this way.
Have Fun,
Dee
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This archive was generated by hypermail 2a23 : Sat Dec 28 2002 - 23:23:04 AKST